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proctalgia:

i love when dogs sigh. its like, hey bud, long day at the office?

goodfuckingcoffee:

packs 2 hours before leaving for a trip

unpacks 3 months after coming home

piplump:

Pros and cons of boys:

  • Con: They’re dicks
  • Pro: Their dicks

(Source: piplump)

Getting out of your comfort zone, taking risks, is what life is. If you’re not good, who cares? You got out there and tried.
Amy Poehler (via velvetblush)

(Source: ucbcomedy)

marianmaidenrose:

fallingaroundagain:

lupeylycan:

un-balanc-ed:

thatwrongthing:

this shirt would fit if it weren’t for boobs: a tragedy

that shirt would fit if i had boobs: the sequel 

this shirt fits perfectly because my boobs are the right size: the fanfiction

my shirts always fit: a man’s tale

what shirt: a nudist au

dutchster:

bruinthecup:

a bOY WAS TRYING TO SEXT ME LAST NIGHT WHEN I WAS ON PAIN MEDS OMG HELP

**bad language b careful b4 reading**

image

if you call what this guy is doing sexting, i never want to sext in my life

im-batman-in-a-dress:

breakfastburritoe:

mascara is supposed to make your eyes look bigger but a real beauty tip is having eyes at 9 in the afternoon

WHAT THE FUCK AM I MISSING????????